The theme for today is: Groaning 3.0

Psalm 22. A psalm of darkness. A psalm of hope. A psalm of horrifying groans. A psalm about the excruciating pain of being forsaken by God. A psalm about the unspeakable joy that reminds us of the gospel.  

All of us go through hard times. Many of us go through dark times. Some of us hit rock bottom. It can’t get any darker. Regardless of the varying degree of our trials, it seems that God is far away. It feels like He’s decided to be uninvolved. Feels like He’s silent.

The silence is deafening. It gets to you. You groan and ask, “Is God ever going to answer?” You feel like you’re hanging by a thread. Your cries seem to bounce back and forth in the walls of your room. Prayers barely make it to the ceiling. Feels like nothing is going beyond. Nothing is reaching God. You groan some more. You feel deserted. You feel forsaken.

That’s a ‘Cole’s Notes’ of what many of my struggling loved ones and friends have shared with me over the years. It’s a place I’ve been to before and it’s a place I’ve been to on and off here in Winnipeg. It’s a struggle.

Psalm 22 validates that struggle. It’s a struggle for each believer. A regular struggle. A frequent struggle. John Calvin wrote, “There is not one of the godly who does not daily experience in himself the same thing. According to the judgment of the flesh, he thinks he is cast off and forsaken by God, while yet he apprehends by faith the grace of God, which is hidden from the eye of sense and reason.” A good reminder from Calvin that we bear our crosses daily. A good reminder that we receive grace daily. A good reminder of the gospel.

A good reminder of Jesus. A good reminder of the cross. On the cross, Jesus experienced the unthinkable, the unimaginable. To be completely forsaken by God. Horrifying. “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?”

This is why we need the gospel. Jesus took our place. He took every single fragment of our rejection and made it his. HE was forsaken. Jesus was forsaken so that we wouldn’t be. So that we will never be. “And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age” (Matthew 28:20).

God is not far away. “The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged (Deuteronomy 31:8). He is not uninvolved. “If I say, ‘Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,’ even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you” (Psalm 139:11-12). He is not silent. Just open your Bibles and let Him speak. “He who has ears to hear, let him hear” (Matthew 11:15).

Psalm 22. A psalm of darkness turns into a psalm of hope. It points us to that moment on the cross that Jesus was willing to be forsaken by God so that we will never again be forsaken by God. So, we’ll keep running and groaning and groaning and running. Fixing our eyes on our Substitute. Fixing our eyes on Jesus who groaned and yet “who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross” (Hebrews 12:2).  

Today’s Updates:

Zach’s condition continues to improve after his septic shock on the weekend. He has been off blood pressure support meds since yesterday, and his blood pressure has remained stable. We are glad for this progress, and we thank God again for saving Zach’s life!

Zach was awake all night and for parts of today despite receiving continuous sedation. When Zach is awake, he grimacing and moves his arms and legs in similar ways as last week. We continue to pray that Zach’s brain will heal and that he will fully wake up one day.

The air leak in the left lung that developed over the weekend looks improved. The doctors say the lung has reinflated, and his chest tube is no longer leaking air. We are so happy to see this progress. Because of this continued healing, Zach has been off the ventilator and on the trach mask since after lunch time. He’s tolerating being off the ventilator very well, and we are so thankful to see Zach’s lung healing.

Zach received a lot of IV fluids today to help his kidneys. His kidneys continue to improve, but still are not fully recovered. More reason for patience and prayer!

The vascular surgery team saw Zach and said that he is able to get his feet amputated now that he has stabilized. They don’t have a date for his surgery yet, but they hope to do it soon to remove another possible cause of pain for Zach. We are happy that Zach is stable enough to go for another surgery, but we also pray for Zach as losing both feet will be another major life change for him.

Please thank God that Zach has stabilized and is off the ventilator. Please pray that Zach will continue to improve, and that God will grant Zach and us peace and comfort with his upcoming amputation. Thank you for your support and care for us and for Zach.

“My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, so far from my cries of anguish?

My God, I cry out by day, but you do not answer, by night, but I find no rest.

Yet you are enthroned as the Holy One; you are the one Israel praises.

In you our ancestors put their trust; they trusted and you delivered them.

To you they cried out and were saved; in you they trusted and were not put to shame.

But I am a worm and not a man, scorned by everyone, despised by the people.

All who see me mock me; they hurl insults, shaking their heads.

“He trusts in the Lord,” they say, “let the Lord rescue him. Let him deliver him, since he delights in him.”

Yet you brought me out of the womb; you made me trust in you, even at my mother’s breast.

From birth I was cast on you; from my mother’s womb you have been my God.

Do not be far from me, for trouble is near and there is no one to help.

Many bulls surround me; strong bulls of Bashan encircle me.

Roaring lions that tear their prey open their mouths wide against me.

I am poured out like water, and all my bones are out of joint.

My heart has turned to wax; it has melted within me.

My mouth is dried up like a potsherd, and my tongue sticks to the roof of my mouth; you lay me in the dust of death.

Dogs surround me, a pack of villains encircles me; they pierce my hands and my feet.

All my bones are on display; people stare and gloat over me.

They divide my clothes among them and cast lots for my garment.

But you, Lord, do not be far from me. You are my strength; come quickly to help me.

Deliver me from the sword, my precious life from the power of the dogs.

Rescue me from the mouth of the lions; save me from the horns of the wild oxen.

I will declare your name to my people; in the assembly I will praise you.

You who fear the Lord, praise him! All you descendants of Jacob, honour him! Revere him, all you descendants of Israel!

For he has not despised or scorned the suffering of the afflicted one; he has not hidden his face from him but has listened to his cry for help.

From you comes the theme of my praise in the great assembly; before those who fear you I will fulfill my vows.

The poor will eat and be satisfied; those who seek the Lord will praise him—may your hearts live forever!

All the ends of the earth will remember and turn to the Lord, and all the families of the nations will bow down before him, for dominion belongs to the Lord and he rules over the nations.

All the rich of the earth will feast and worship; all who go down to the dust will kneel before him—those who cannot keep themselves alive.

Posterity will serve him; future generations will be told about the Lord.

They will proclaim his righteousness, declaring to a people yet unborn: He has done it!”

(Psalm 22)